Friendly Fraud

Some days I just feel like a fraud. To my students (and many people at my school), I am the authority on mathematics. This frightens me. I took 3 pure math classes at my college. The rest of the math classes I took were more applied in the field of statistics. I like math and I understand all the math I teach, but I've forgotten much of what I learned in calculus. What is NCLB doing if it sees me as highly qualified in the field of mathematics? My students deserve the best. They should have a math teacher who remembers how to find the limit of an equation, not just the content that I am responsible for teaching. Yes, I passed my AEPA, but only with great stress and worry on my part. Does passing an exam really prove that I am an expert?

I guess contemplating this shows that I care. Recognizing my own faults and being honest about what I need to change is a strength of mine. I know that my caring and love of my students is important. But is caring about the students enough? No. A change must be made. I need to be proactive and brush up on my higher level math skills. Of course it is easier to say this than to actually do this. To do this would involve a commitment of time and energy which is hard to find in my schedule. Yet when things are important we must make time for them.

This is a personal effort to change. Not everyone involved in this system may feel this pull for change. This is where we have to think beyond ourselves. I have control over the decisions I make for my students, but not over everyone else. Sound and strictly enforced policies are what we need to effect change.